Welp, my skin is peeling off at an alarming rate, and I’m covered in bug bites. I just got back from Belize. (Everyone says wowww, oh woooooowwww) It’s hilarious that the number one thing I hear from people is “I wish I could travel alone” when I tell them I took the country solo. Some people want to know how to do it: easy, book the ticket, get on the plane, and push yourself to do things. I won’t pretend though that I was super stoked to go on this trip I forced myself into. So, I just wanted to tell y’all how it went, what I did, and then you can decide for yourself if you want to give it a whirl.
My flight was late on Thursday No. 1 was going to take me to the airport. I didn’t want to go honestly. I laid on the couch and COMPLAINED about going to a tropical country to do nothing. Anxiety is real, I wasn’t excited, I was terrified that I was forcing myself into an uncomfortable scenario. Unfortunately, we don’t grow without it!
Of course, once I got to my Air BnB I just wanted to nap. I had some work to get done so I was a complete home body. I also downloaded Tinder AND Bumble. Because that makes sense, right? Little did I know there are actually some Marines, and smokin hot British Army dudes in Belize. So ultimately it made SOME sense. I had this grand image of a vacay fling…That never came true hahaha. Started realizing just how many there were around about the 5th British army dude I matched with. Then two of them knew each other and asked me to have a threesome…Spoiler alert I didn’t do that. Most dudes by themselves can’t please women…two isn’t going to be any better. And, in addition, it sounds like a good way to get murdered. Also, bringing a dude back to an Air AnB where someone lives makes me SUPER uncomfortable. Anyone else? And they were driving me wherever I wanted to go, so it would be like oh heyyyyy here’s the British dude I probably am going to have sex with in your home….NOPE doesn’t sound like something I wanted to accomplish.
Night one I went out to dinner and went to bed at 9pm. I know it sounds so glamorous. Honestly though, adjusting to a new country alone is uncomfortable. Day two I went out to the countryside to horseback ride, and hike. Was propositioned to be married to Jordan who went horseback riding with me... I told him maybe next visit. Went to dinner again and met some locals that owned a bar. They were SO DRUNK, but SO FRIENDLY. I realized most people that lived in Belize truly were super kind. That was my favorite part by far. They wanted to take me to the bar they owned, so I jumped in the truck calming my anxiety with long deep breaths. Walked into the bar, told the manager Sandy sent me, and he IMMEDIATELY took me to table full of people! I was introduced to a few people, namely a local gal who was so genuine and it seemed like she knew everyone that walked in the door. I had a few cocktails, chatted with some friends at the table, was on my phone a little too much, but that’s alright! It was a pretty huge step for me to go to a bar alone in a totally unfamiliar country, and I had a great time.
Day 3 was the first day I felt independent. I went out to Caye Caulker to go snorkeling. It was the first day I talked to everyone I sat near and tried to learn something about them. I met some fantastic people that day. I felt whole visiting Caye Caulker, and I felt this freeing independence. It all centered on how I opened to other people. If you know me, you know I’m a planner, but that day I went with my heart! I only had $50, a swimsuit and shorts and a cover up. But I thought FUCK IT I’ll stay here for a night and just enjoy some time with my new, wonderful Canadian friends. I got an air bnb on my phone and literally rocked my swimsuit outfit for over 24 hours. I was sunburnt, poor, certainly not stylish, but I had the most fun I’ve had in a long time.
Day 4 I spent with my new Canadian BFF’s lounging. It was perfection. I can’t wait for an opportunity to see them again. I learned about the perception of American’s, also that Canadians are friends with anyone that lives in Canada. They all know each other. Unreal.
All in all, going somewhere alone wasn’t groundbreaking. And much like everything else in life, having fun and enjoying the experience was my choice no matter the situation. That is so powerful! You can go on that trip alone, but you have to suck up the fear and anxiety, choose to have a good time, and don’t stress on the plan. Just let it happen even if you’re only outfit is a swimsuit and wet shorts. Don’t worry, people will still see your bright ass light shining.